Thursday, March 13, 2014

Nothing new to report

Life is normal.  Well, relatively normal.  We're doing school.  We're making meals occasionally, going out occasionally.  We go out.  We stay in.

Overall, we're tired.  Emotionally, physically, mentally.  We need rest and we're just not really sure how to do it.  Sleep has been difficult for both of us.  At times it feels like our bodies are still on high alert.  It's just hard to shake everything that we experienced over the past few weeks.

Still we're trying.  Trying to get time alone.  We take turns going to the basement to get away where it's quiet and we can have some time to think.  We need time to process but we're just not really sure how.

This weekend we go to Columbus.  There we'll try to process more, get time with friends, go to the doctor, be in a place we used to call home.  We're hopeful it will be life giving.  Would you pray for us?  Would you pray that our hearts would continue to heal?  Would you pray that we would be gracious with people as they welcome us back and try to love us well?

Honestly we don't even know how to be cared for at this point.  A part of us wants to be hermits and hide away, avoiding as many people as possible.  Another part of us wants to shout it from the rooftops, talk about what happened, somehow sort out the chaos that happened.  Is this really our lives?

And where is the Lord in the midst of this?  He is faithful.  He is here even when we don't understand.  Right now, I cling to Psalm 51 and am grateful for this passage especially.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.

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