Processing and our future

I read this devotional and I feel like it really relates to a little bit of what our lives have been like lately.  God redeems the Israelites

Sometimes I think, why did we come to Venezuela?  Life is just so hard at times here.  Other times recently, I've had the thoughts of why did you deport us from Venezuela?  None of it really seems to make sense.  I just don't have the wisdom or the foresight for these kinds of things.

It is something that I think most of the team is wrestling through.  As I spent time with the women on our team yesterday, I couldn't help but be broken hearted for them.  Many are just trying to recover from everything that happened.  Many feel like they have nothing to give.  In ministry or in life.  And it just breaks my heart that they've had to deal with these hard realities.

What feels equally as strange is that I'm not even remotely qualified, not to mention going through the same thing as them, to be able to walk them through this.  I wish I could help.  But maybe helping just means pointing them to websites like this, pointing them to Jesus, just sitting and listening.  Really that's all I have to give.

Part of the sad reality of all of the deportation process is that it has solidified our decision to return to the States and stay with Cru there.  Of course there are many reasons for our decision, but it honestly feels like it's been pretty hard to recover from the past month.  We were already in a place where it felt really hard to stay here long-term and were wrestling with what to do with our future.  But we are just emotionally, relationally and mentally exhausted.  We need time to recoup.

So what does this mean?  We don't really know exactly.  Bart is having conversations with the region about our future.  We don't know much at this point, but we do know that we love our region and we love what we do and we for sure don't want to leave staff.  We are anxious to figure out the next step in our lives, but we also want to be wise with our future.  That means lots of conversations with people about what would be good/healthy for us with the transition ahead.  So for now, we wait.